The Reverse Oreo Effect

My niece meticulously deconstructs her Oreo cookies into three separate pieces - two chocolate cookies and one slice of frosting. The idea is to eat the chocolate cookies first, leaving the best for last, the frosting. In the case of an Oreo, the stuff in the middle is the best part!

College tends to be the opposite. The beginning of college, while a little nerve-wracking, is overall quite exciting! Everything is new and full of possibility. Dreams are fresh on the mind. This excitement is only exceeded by the end of college - graduation! The day of graduation is a true high point in life. In the middle of these highlights, however, is where the real battle is won or lost.

For, in the middle, students run into extremely challenging coursework, long hours slogging through homework, limited funds trying to make ends meet, and many other bumps in the road. Suddenly, college does not seem as glamorous. Rather, it is a lot of hard work, with difficult choices, and plenty of confusion and self-debt. Sure, there are many high points along the journey as well. But in the middle, the rubber meets the road, and students either pick themselves up and dust themselves off, or they quit.

There is no way to magically transport yourself from the first day of class to your commencement ceremony. In the long run, you would not want to do this anyway. The whole point of college is to push you to grow, to challenge your fortitude, to expand the limits of your mind, and to allow you to fail (and get back up) in a relatively safe environment. You come out stronger, wiser, skilled, knowledgeable, and prepared for the next stages of life. Iron sharpens iron. The college degree you receive at graduation is a testimony to your power.

To make it through the middle, you must commit to your success. Create a plan by setting goals and then utilizing all the tools available to reach them. Revisit your motivators often. Practice delayed gratification, which is to do what you ought to do, even when it is not what you want to do. See failure as a learning process, not a dead end. When the going gets tough, the tough get going. Commit!

The Power of Vision

Your thoughts shape your actions. Use the power of vision to direct your actions toward your goals and dreams. Check out this video on living a life of choice, not chance.

Vision of Success

Vision is the foundation of any successful journey. If you do not know where you are going, how can you take the first step? Alternatively, if you do not have any passion or philosophy animating your actions, how can you know that the journey is meaningful?

When I envision success, I picture a tree. To me, success is growing tall toward the light while being sustained and grounded by roots. Success is looking toward the horizon for inspiration while swaying in the freedom of the wind. Success is becoming who you are and being authentic in every season. The decisions I make in my career, the way I carry myself each day, the vocations I pursue: I do my best to ensure that every choice I make in life resonates with my vision of success.

At this moment in life, my vision of success is intuitive and free. Other people define success in more concrete and specific terms - complete a Bachelor's degree, get a job as a nurse, travel to South America, buy a house, et cetera. Either approach works, whatever resonates with you at this time in your life. If this is the first time you are thinking about your vision of success, it will likely be easier to start with concrete and specific goals.

Your vision of success will likely transform and grow over time through new opportunities, life-changing experiences, and self-development. Great! From where you stand now, what is your vision of success?

How to create a vision board:

1. Picture yourself 20 years down the road, then write down answers to the following questions. What have you accomplished? What do you have? What do you do? Where do you live? How do other people to perceive you and your actions? What contributions have you made? How do you act? How do you feel?

2. Pick up a 20"x30" piece of sturdy paper, foam board, or card board.

3. Collect pictures, words, and phrases from magazines or your own albums that represent your vision.

4.  Make a collage or map on your board using these images. Use markers or paints to add color or words. Be creative with your vision!

5. Place your vision board somewhere you see it often. In a year or two, make another vision board!

A vision board created by a student in TRIO Summer Bridge

Defining Success

Imagine it is your 85th birthday party. Look around. Who is all there?

Now look closer. There are pictures along the wall from various highlights in your life. What do you see?

Finally, you sit down as various family, friends, and community members offer toasts. They talk about your accomplishments. They offer kind words about the way you have carried yourself over the years. They express thanks for the things you have done on their behalf. They celebrate a life well-lived. What do you hear?

The people, the places, the stories from your 85th birthday party: this imagery reflects your definition of a successful life. You may have seen career accomplishments, community contributions, recreational experiences, meaningful relationships, educational attainments, earned respect, some combination thereof...

This exercise is part of the important first step of goal setting: reflecting on your vision of success. Now it is your responsibility to create this success through thoughtful goal setting and determined effort.